Updated: Sep 25
Do you work hard to fit in & be like everyone else?
By blending in, you lose your identity & trade a sense of self for belonging.
Life becomes measured against conformity & group norms. The reward centers of the brain are activated by conformity. Our memory banks are impacted by other people’s judgement & preferences. Having disparate thoughts seems unbearable in our desperation to fit in.
Harmful to Ignore Your DNA
If we were born to be homogenous, innovation would not be possible. We would be surrounded by robotic ‘yes people’ who agree in monotonous unison. Our lens would be black & white. The spice of life would be non-existent as our experiences would be predetermined & taste like our neighbor’s leftovers.
Our personalities are formed when we are children with a unique behavioral DNA.
By ignoring this pull to be ourselves, we morph into adult clones. We can choose to be bold & stand out, or suffer in boredom & lack of fulfillment. Step off of the game board into a world of color where being different is rewarded.
Know Who You Are – Not What Others Say
To standout is to have an exceptional ability. How can we determine our exceptional ability if we do not know who we really are?
We spend an inordinate amount of time looking for external information from others. But we are the only ones who know the true meaning of self. By doing a deep exploration, we are able to solve the mystery internally & understand our uniqueness.
To know yourself is the beginning of all wisdom. Socrates
View yourself as a unique & complex puzzle where the pieces are comprised of innate gifts, skills, & passion. It may take a while to assemble the puzzle but you will be rewarded with vitality & purpose.
Fitting Out will no longer be anxiety ridden. Life will be filled with excitement in knowing yourself for the first time.
Stand Out & Be Unforgettable
When you accept your differences, you realize the benefits of standing out.
People will feel inspired by your willingness to ignore being judged for not fitting in. You will be able to let go of the pressures associated with living on someone else’s terms.
Those who accept you, will be in your life for the right reasons & not attracted to a fake persona. You will no longer need to remember the various personas & masks.
The adage of fitting a square peg into a round hole will no longer have an impact. As Huey Lewis sang “it’s hip to be square”. For the first time, freedom of expression will have a new meaning.
The world accommodates you for fitting in, but only rewards you for standing out. Matshona Dhliwayo
How to Fit Out Now
After doing a deep dive to understand how you Fit Out, keep the positive momentum going by discovering the best way to express yourself.
Be authentic & make every day 'bring your child to work day' by experiencing the excitement for the first time. Leave groups where you feel lost in the crowd. These are not your people so don’t expend any energy trying to convert them.
Determine how to communicate with whomever is in front of you.
In order to cut through the noise, you need to be figuratively loud & creatively demonstrate your uniqueness. By being confident, the doubters & detractors will have less room to influence others opinions of you.
Create a personal mission statement which incorporates your vision & values.
This will ensure that you are projecting who you really are & acting in alignment with the you who has always existed, but is finally able to step out from behind the curtain. Be driven by your mission, not by fitting in.
It’s not about becoming a new person but becoming the person you were meant to be & already are but don’t know how to be. Heath L. Buckmaster
Live who you are & don’t wait for permission.
You were born to make a difference.
There is no time like the present to make an impact. Let go of any doubts & march up to the crowd & watch the room stand at attention.
Don’t Fit In, FIT OUT!
Are you ready to Stand Out & Be Yourself👇